For those of you who argue that gay men and women deserve the same rights as heterosexual couples, I completely and wholeheartedly agree. Any two people - heck, it can even be between a person and a robot for all I care - that love each other deeply deserve protection and benefits from the state; gay couples deserve to be recognized as equals to heterosexual couples. This isn't the issue I want to focus on; gay rights are already a given - it's the right thing to do. If they aren't equal under the law right now, then something should be done to make them equal under the law. End of debate.
The real issue that I would like to discuss is the issue of "marriage." Let's take a hypothetical situation: there are two couples, each in deep, loving relationships. Both share the same benefits - both file their taxes together, both enjoy tax credits to help raise their children. The only difference? The state recognizes one as a "marriage" and the other as a "domestic partnership." But is this really a difference? Honestly, why do people care about what it's called? First of all, if you love someone, why do you need the government to tell you that you love him/her/it/whatever? Love transcends the law; a piece of paper cannot tell you what to love or not love. The word "marriage" is nothing but overhyped legal jargon. Who says you can't love someone fully if you're not married to them? Heck, what difference would it make if they changed the word "marriage" to something ridiculous like "asdkfuweiortuaiodjfaklsdjfkasd"? Would people stop loving each other? I certainly hope not.
My point is - why are we bitterly bickering and fighting over terminology? We're wasting everybody's time, we're wasting campaign money, and we're not getting anywhere. It's as if we're spending millions of dollars and hours just to figure out a correct definition for a useless word in a dictionary. This whole idea is pointless - and the blame for this ridiculous debate doesn't fall on one side either. Both sides deserve equal blame. (How's that for equality?) On the one hand, you have the gay marriage supporters, the Prop. 8 opposition, the liberals, whatever the hell you want to call them. I agree that if gay couples do not have equal rights as heterosexual couples, then they should definitely lobby for equal rights. But, why the whole hissy-fit over the recognition of "marriage" by the government of all things? Who cares what the government labels you as, so long as you have equal rights? It's not like the government is your mom or something - do you really need the government's approval to love someone? If you guys want equal rights, fine. But please stop wasting our time about the whole "marriage" thing. On the other hand, you have the gay marriage opponents, the Prop. 8 backers, the conservatives, whatever you want to call them. These people are just as, if not more stupid than the gay marriage supporters. These heterosexual couples are happily married. (Or well, you're supposed to be happily married...) The government says they're married. They get legal benefits, tax cuts, wills written out to each other - the whole package. Why in the world must they care if two other men or two other women, that they've never seen before and probably will get to never know in their entire lives, get married? What can two random strangers getting married as a homosexual couple possibly do to damage the lives of a heterosexual couple? There is absolutely no logical reason for them to stop people from giving themselves a silly label - honestly, who cares what the government labels people as? If two men get married, will you stop loving your wife/husband? I really hope that's not the case. And for those of you planning on making some ridiculous argument with the bible (<--I'm leaving this uncapitalized on purpose to offend people who care about labels) - please don't. I mean, these gay couples - many of them are devout Christians, faithful to God, church attenders - you know, decent people who are probably going to heaven. Why fight so hard to deprive them of this little "sin" when there are devil-praising heretics out there spreading violence and hate? Why not spend some time and money going after those guys? Get your priorities straight, people.
So that's about all I have to say - it's a little less formal this time because I'm a bit lazy.. but yeah. Please feel free to leave comments.
One last note, though: to those of you who think that equality will only be guaranteed if the couples are placed under the same label - take a look at race. Do we need to call all black people "white" in order to guarantee their equality? No, and the same should apply to couples. We shouldn't need to label something to guarantee equal rights. It might be a bit easier, but it certainly isn't necessary.
Last last note: I actually had no idea about the Argentina thing when I wrote this..
Last last note: I actually had no idea about the Argentina thing when I wrote this..
seriously, why bother with people you won't ever encounter in your life. what other people do as a couple probably won't ever affect you. if you're bothered by homosexuality, just look away.
ReplyDeleteand about the bible issue. look at SF, or all those other cities/states that legalize gay marriage. that doesnt mean that the christians there are "bad christians" cuz they helped legalize gay marriage
just let people do whatever they want to do
Lol. Nice way to make things equal--both sides suck. Haha, another friend of mine sees it the same way. I guess what I can say in response is that, for the prop 8 opponents, they are fighting the government precisely because they want equal rights, like benefits that heterosexual couples get. But other than that, recognition by the government is a pretty stupid reason. If any couple (or triple, quadruple, etc) truly loved each other, then in theory benefits and stuff shouldn't matter at all. Just be happy with each other whether or not you are "legally married."
ReplyDeleteI wanna say that gay marriage opponents are more stupid in wasting precious resources and everyone's time. Seriously, if they just conceded and stop preaching their shit about things that have nothing to do with their personal lives, then we can better focus on more important issues like climate, immigration, and oil (lol).
In the end, here's my solution to this battle. No government recognition and no benefits! You can "marry" or "rtaesfraesgaesfes" whoever you want, as many as you want! That way, those lobbying for gay "rights" no longer have rights to lobby for; those trying to protect the "sanctity of marriage" will have nothing left to protect. =)
Ah. This is interesting. Haha Usually people would take a side but I like that you didn't and criticized both. I think people fighting over things like labels is kind of dumb, but the thing is, the government gives them some sort of meaning don't they? So it kind of does affect people's lives to an extent (like "immigrant" for example). And I'm wondering if people are afraid that they will not get treated the same if it is called a domestic partnership. The government might see it as the same, but it could be stigmatized or seen as less than marriage. Like the thing you said about black people and white people. Black people should have the same rights despite not being called white, but we know that throughout history, being a marginalized group in the US, they didn't always get that, even after laws by the government were passed. You raise interesting points though and I can't say I disagree with most of the things you said. Haha. I guess I'm just saying that despite all that you said, people still have to work around the system... Unless it dramatically changes or we are thrown into anarchy. (Whoo! xD)
ReplyDelete(jk about the anarchy whoo. lol)
I'll leave what I said to you earlier here so I can remember what I said at a later time.
ReplyDeleteTax benefits are the only thing that matter with marriage. If they don't get that, then they should fight for it. If they do, stfu and fix the damn oil spill problem.
I downloaded Chrome so i could respond to this. feel special, ben.
ReplyDeleteI also realize how ridiculously late this is, but i just noticed this yesterday.
I agree and disagree. I think the best solution for this situation is basically what you've said. States should give out a certificate that allows any two people who love each other to have the benefits of marriage. But they shouldn't call it marriage. Give EVERYONE domestic partnerships, and if people feel like they need a marriage in the eyes of god, they can go to a church and do just that. The government has no right to announce that people can't do something because the bible says so. Chuch and state separation, yo.
As for your whole thing about "why bother caring if they have marriage or not, if they have the same rights" well, simply put, they don't. It's the separate but equal mentality. Even if all the rights seem the same in the written law, there will always be different. It's like saying, "ben, you're chinese, so you can't go to college. YOu can go to this other place, which will teach you the same things you would learn at college, and in many ways, it's the same thing, but you'll never be able to say you went to college." Though it might seem the same for you, hopefully you can see how this isn't actually fair.
If the government gives out marriage licenses to some people, they should give them to everyone. If they want to hand out "domesitc partnerships", then great, nobody gets state sanctioned marriages.
And I've heard the theory that some people don't like gay marriage because it threatens the ideas of established gender roles. those people need to get over themselves. We're not in the 1950's anymore.
but my point isn't that they're not equal
ReplyDeletethe point is that this is stupid enough that we shouldn't even be talking about this
it's like a new breed of squirrels going up to the US government and being like "HEY WE'RE SQUIRRELS TOO YOU SHOULD LABEL US AS SQUIRRELS CAUSE THATS ALL YOU SHOULD BE FOCUSING ON, NOT THE ECONOMY, BUT WHETHER WE'RE LABELED AS SQUIRRELS"